I can identify with today’s guest poster so very much, since we share very similar stories. I was so excited when Sarah Mae introduced me to Cyndi’s blog a couple months ago and I knew the Lord brought her across my path for a reason! You can read more about Cyndi’s amazing journey to healing on her site.
I wish I could say I had a terrible childhood and because of that I made poor choices. I wish I could blame my parents, my friends, my teachers at school, anyone, for the decisions I made. Unfortunately, I can’t.
I accepted Christ when I was nine years old. I accepted him as my Savior but I did not make him the Lord of my life. I wanted Christ but I wasn’t willing to let him have control over everything in my life.
Skip ahead to my senior year of high school I met a young man who was a senior in college. I really can’t explain everything that happened in the year and a half we dated but in no way should I have married him. But I did, after my freshman year in college. I was too young and very naive.
No one thought we should marry including me but for some reason I felt I could not get out of it. There were so many red flags but I ignored them. I should have seen it coming; I should have known it wouldn’t last.
Invitations had been sent. Gifts had been given. I thought I couldn’t back out.
Let me just say this, if anyone is on the verge of getting married and for any reason you feel it’s not God’s best for you, don’t do it. Marriage is too sacred. It’s much better to go through the pain of breaking an engagement than breaking a marriage. Spoken from someone who knows!
The next four and a half years while I was married were very difficult. I will not go into detail, but it was not a home I would want to raise Courtney and Cory in. It was certainly not the childhood I had had.
In 1990, I realized I could not stay in the marriage any longer so Courtney and Cory and I moved in with my parents. The reasons I left were biblical reasons but I still felt like a failure.
I was 23 years old, divorced and had a three year old and a two year old.
Honestly, I was devastated. I felt I had messed up so bad that no one would ever want me and surely God could never use me. My relationship with the Lord had been lukewarm and I was certain he was through with me…
Thankfully, I had family and friends who loved me and encouraged me. My Mom and my sister, Traci were huge influences in my life. They reminded me that no matter what I had done, Jesus could and would forgive me if I would surrender to Him.
I remember distinctly laying in bed beside Courtney and Cory’s bed and re-dedicating my life to Christ. I admitted I had been doing things my way and I had failed miserably. I needed Christ to lead and direct my life.
I had no idea what God had planned for Courtney and Cory and I but I was going to follow Him. More than anything I wanted my children to see Christ in me so they too would accept him as their Lord and Savior.
During the next year I got involved in church, I began studying His word, and I began to really fall in love with Jesus.
About a year after my divorce I got a call from a young man, who was the Minister of Music and Youth at a local church. I had met him a few months before and thought he was cute but I knew he was a minister and didn’t think he would ever be interested in me.
What I didn’t know was, he was interested and had been praying for several months before asking me out. He knew I was divorced and I had two children and if we were to fall in love it would change the course of all of our lives……and it did! (Wayne always says it was Courtney and Cory he fell in love with first! )
The next several months were the best and some of the most difficult few months of my life. Wayne and I got engaged but unfortunately not everyone thought we should marry.
Wayne and I continued to seek the Lord and prayed, Romans 8:31, “If God is for us who could be against us?” (We actually had this verse inscribed in our wedding bands.)
Let me say this before going on, not in any way am I saying divorce is the easy way out. Malachi 2:17 says, “I hate divorce,” says the Lord God of Israel. Believe me, if anyone can understand this, I can. My sin has been forgiven but the consequences of my sin have been painful. I know why God hates divorce!
We obviously did get married and we truly believe God put us together for a reason. We are a testimony of God’s grace.
A much younger Wayne and Cyndi on our wedding day in October.
God has been faithful and has blessed us more than we could ever have imagined. Wayne is currently the Senior Pastor of a Baptist church and I continue to…
Walk in His Grace.
My cup runneth over as this past weekend I witnessed God’s grace as my daughter married a wonderful Christian man. My husband performed the ceremony and I was honored to be her matron of honor.
Drinking From a Saucer
I’ve never made a fortune,
And it’s probably too late now,
But I don’t worry about that much,
I’m happy anyhow.
As I go along life’s journey,
Reaping better than I have sowed,
I’m drinking from my saucer,
‘Cause my cup has overflowed.
Haven’t got a lot of riches,
And sometimes the going is rough.
But I’ve got a family that loves me.
That makes me rich enough.
I just thank God for His blessings,
And the mercy He has bestowed.
I’m drinking from my saucer,
‘Cause my cup has overflowed.
And I remember times when things went wrong,
And my faith got a little thin.
Then all at once the dark clouds broke,
And the old sun broke through again.
So Lord, help me not to gripe
About the tough rows I have hoed.
I’m drinking from my saucer,
‘Cause my cup has overflowed.
And if God gives me the strength and courage
When the way gets steep and rough,
I won’t ask for other blessings.
I’m already blessed enough.
And may I never be too busy
To help another bear his load.
Then I’ll keep drinking from my saucer
‘Cause my cup has overflowed.
~Author Unknown
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I am living proof of how the Lord can take a broken life and turn it into something beautiful. Although I am still very far from perfection, I am still a work of His art. My heart's prayer is that "Brokenness into Beauty" will be a source of inspiration and encouragement to all! There is hope, and there is healing on the horizon.
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God just can’t stop Himself from being awesome!
A beautiful story of redemption!
Cherie´s last [type] ..Faith in Parenting